The best anti-virus program for a computer is SAVE-SEX.
Leave the plastic cover on the floppy when inserting in drive.
1.As a final incentive before giving up a difficult task,try to imagine it succeessfully accompliced by someone you voilently hate
2.There is no substitute for hard work.
3.Duty pays you. Safety saves you.
4.Take time to look- it is price of success
Take time to think-it is a source of power
Take time to read-it is a source of wisdom
Take time to be friendly-it is a way of happiness
5.Between two evils, choose neither. Between two goods, choose both
6. The shortest way to do many thing is to do a single thing at a time.
7.Think you are well, and all that is well with you. And nature will read your thoughts and make them true.
8.Be true to yourself and others. Do not try to appear better or greater than what you are.
9.Troubles which are tackled instead of being talkedabout, dissappear like mist before the morning sun.
10.Undertake not what you cannot perform but be careful to keep your promise.
11.Forget injuries, but never forget kindness
12.Learn something new each day-keep your eyes, ears and most of all your mind open.
13.Pray as if everything depended work as if everything depended on you.
14.In success and failure, in sunshine and rain, in prosperity and adversity be at peace with the world and with yourself.
15.The way you manage your time determnes your success or failure as a man.
16.Honour the chief. There must be a head of everything.
17.Be glad and rejoice in the other fellow's success. Study his methods.
18.Do not attempt to do a thing unless you are sure of yourself;
but don't relinquish it simply because someone else is not sure of you.
19.Do not express dislike for a person when (s)he is not present to offer a defence.
20.Prayer is the first duty in life; And to plead lack of time for it is an insult to GOD.
21.Who agree like bell; they want nothing but hanging.
22.Anger is a short madness. Don't allow it to ruin longstanding reations.
23.Nothing is bad but it might have been worse.
24.Loyalty to friends and loyalty to certain basic principles are essential to success in
any sphere.
25.Instead of feeling inferior because someone else can do something you cannot do, concentrate on what you can do that others cannot.
25.To be angry is to revenge the fault of others on us
26.As heat conserved is transmitted into energy, so can anger controlled can be transmitted into a power which can move the world.
27.Our errors are steps on the way.
28.A fool may be known by six things :anger without cause, speech without profit,
change without progress, enquiry without object,
putting trust in a stranger, mistaking foes for friends.
DO YOU HAVE ANY OF THE ABOVE QUALITIES??????
29.It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for wt you are not.
30.Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
31.You will never find time for any thing. If you want time you must find it.
32.If you want people to think well of you do not speak well of yourself.
33.Our prayers should be for blessing in general, for God knows best what is good for us.
34.If you shed tears when you miss the sun; you also miss the stars.
35.You may make mistakes, but you are not a failure until you start blaming someone else for it.
36.ANGER is only one letter shorter than DANGER.
37.The man who has done less than his best have done nothing.39.The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.
38.Think more about what you can make happen than about what happens to you.
40.Stand for truth even at the expense of losing popularity.
41.For every minute of anger you lose sixty seconds of happiness.
42.Do not do to others that which would anger you if others did it to you0D
43.Failure establishes only this, that our determination to succeed was not strong enough.
44.Write injuries in dust, benefits in marble.
45.Be clean in all matters and you will never be ashamed.
46.Saying "I did not find time " shows you did not WISH to do it.
47.People who believe a problem can be solved tend to become busy solving it.
48.If you don't think every day is a good day try missing one!
49.Learn to hide your h
eartaches and woes under a pleasant smile.
50.Every good thought is a star which leads you on, shining in the dark, making your pathway radiant.
51.Those who do not have goals are doomed to work for those who do.
52.Be thankful if you have a job that is harder than you like. A razor cannot be sharpened on a velvet.
53.When you long for something, it means you love it.
54.DON'T ever give up before you have solved the problem you are facing.
55.Don't say things. What you are stands over you and thunders, so nobody would hear what you say on the contrary.
56.Think that day lost whose decending son has seen no worthy action done.
57.We weave a tangled web when we first practise to deceive.
58.Love is only chatter. Friends are all that matters.
59.The heart has its reasons, which, reason does not know.
60.Tommorow I will live, the fool says. Today is too late. The wise lived yesterday.
61.It is better to forget and smile rather than remember and be sad.
62.The more hot arguments you win the more good friends you lose.
63.Face the situation fearlessly and soon there will be no situation to face.
64.Mistakes fail in their missin of helping the person who blames them on others.
65.Do not worry about failure. Worry about all the chances you miss when you don't try.
66.Be sure you are right and then go ahead.
67.That sorrow is heavy which bows the head, when love is alive nad hope is dead.
68.The truth that's tild with bad intent beats all lies you can invent.
69.In life knowing how to lose is just as important as knowing how to win.
70.Think in the morning,
do it in the afternoon,
eat in the evening,
sleep in the night.
71.If hardwork is you weapon then success will be you slave.
72.Women's heart is soft but if it becomes hard, a diamond also cannot stand it.
73.Though you are travelling on the right path, if you take unneccessary breaks others will push you back.
74.Thankfulness should be expressed, but you shouldn't ask for it.
75.Love is all in fire and yet freezing,
Love is much in winnig
, but is more in loosing.
Love is ever sick and yet is never dying,
Love is ever true and yet is ever lying,
Love does doath in liking and is mad in loathing,
Love indeed is everything, yet indeed is nothing.
76.It is important to follow rules rather than to make rules.
77.A person in front of whom you dare to be yourself is you trues friend.
78.Never expr
s to the world what you can do. Show the world by doing it.
79.See that you are needed to atleast one person in life.
80.It is better for us to feel bad rather than to make others feel bad.
81.What you don't like happening to yourself, don't do it to others.
82.Miracles do occur, but one has to work hard for them to happen.
83.Show appreciation of the smallest services by your loved ones and employees.
84.The higher we are places, the more humble should we walk.
85.It is attitude rather than your aptitude which determines your altitude.
86.Don't be reckless with other peoples hearts and don't put on with people who are recless with yours.
87.Don't waste your time with jealousy. Sometimes you are ahead, sometimes behind. The race is lomg and in the end its only with yourself.
88.Be nice to you sibling. They are your best link to your past.
89.Understand that friends come and go. But you should hold on to a precious few.
0A90.Don't expect anyone else to support you at any point.
91.Dream as if you will live forever. Live as if you will die today.
92.Be prepared and some day your chance will come.
93.Watch the sun rise atleast once a year.
94.Be there when people need you.
95.When I hear someone say "life is heard" I am tempted to ask "compared to what"-Sydney J Harris.
96.If you are too careful, you are so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble upon something-Gertrude Stein.
97.A hero is no braver than a ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer-R W Emerson.
98.Never fear shadows. They simply mean there is some light near by.
99.Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
100.Shoot for the moon... cause even i
f you miss you will end up in the stars-Les Brown.
Stress is when you wake up and realises that you haven't slept yet.
Reality is an illusion that is born out of shortage of alcohol.
I want to live in Switserland where the mountains are higher than the taxes.
Join the army, meet interesting people and then ... kill them...
All of you who believe in psychokinetics, raise 'my' hand ...
Lots of people stop working once they found a job!
I am still single, my parents-in-law were not able to have children.
Being nuts or crazy is inheritable, you get it from your children.
The fact that there are 'intelligent' extraterrestrian creatures is proven by the fact that they did not contact us yet.
I said no to drugs, but they did nog listen!
10.000 new jobs ... all tax inspectors?!
Mistakes have been made, others will be punished.
As long as they pretend to pay me, I pretend I am working.
I started out with nothing... and I still have most of it!
3 monkeys escaped from the zoo ... one was caught watching tv ... another playing football and the third one was caught reading this txt message
My mother-in-law walks 5 miles every day... I wonder where she'd be by now.
Like a rose withers, so is our relationship withering ...
Keep the school clean ... stay home!
Be quiet in the classroom, respect the fact that others sleep!
We do have to go to school ... Have to is force ... Forcing is slavery .... Slavery is forbidden ... SO ... we do not have to go to school!
The word HELLO means: H=How are you? E=Evrything alright? L=Like 2 hear from you! L=Love 2 see you soon O=Obviously I miss you..SO, HELLO
No boys no love, no love no sex, no sex no people, no people no school, no school no problems
That is how a triatlon has been invented : go swimming on foot and coming home by bike.
The IDEAL man does not smoke, does not drink, does not flirt, goes to bed early, in short ... does not exist
It's the one who won't be taken, who cannot seem to give.
It's the soul afraid of dying ... That never learns to live
It's the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the change.
It's the heart afraid of Breaking ... that never learns to dance.
Secrets, they only last long enough to break you down
Life is beautiful if you are willing to see it
A bra is a thing that keeps up what would hang down otherwise ...
When my father broke in to my mother I had to sit there for months!
Boys say it's great, boys say it's fine. 9 months later they say it's not mine !
Teachers help you with problems that you would not have if they were not there.
I am in seventh heaven, the other six do not want me.
Women are like hurricanes! When they come they are wet and heavy. When they leave they take your home and your car ! !
No one ever died because of hard labour, but I think :"why would I take the risk?"
I love working. I can look at it for hours.
We used to listen to the Doors, now we have Windows.
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit.
Computers are machines to help you solve problems you wouldn't have if you didn't have a computer.
Life would be a lot easier if I had the source-code.
Life is like a nose, you have to take out what is in it !
You need 60 muscles to be angry and 20 to smile why would you make things difficult?
My thoughts wondering off, I am always everywhere.
I intended to become rich while sleeping, but I could not fall asleep yet.
It is better to have one bullet in the hand than ten in the back.
Nok nok. Who's there? ..... Marie ...... Marie who? ...... Marie who wanna...!!
Wanna get stoned? Drink wet cement!
Umm...your .... ZIP is open...
Reality is for people who can't face science fiction.
Idiot (id-ee-it) n.- One who disagrees with you.
How do frogs die ? They Ker-mit suicide.
Elvis is dead and I don't feel so good myself.
I'm not as dumb as you look.
If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.
What do I miss about my wife? Her absence.
Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep.
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